***********************************************************

As Bill Sees It

Anonymity and Sobriety, p. 299

As the A.A. groups multiplied, so did anonymity problems.
Enthusiastic over the spectacular recovery of a brother alcoholic, we'd
sometimes discuss those intimate and harrowing aspects of his case
meant for his sponsor's ear alone. The aggrieved victim would then
rightly declare that his trust had been broken.

When such stories got into circulation outside of A.A., the loss of
confidence in our anonymity promise was severe. It frequently turned
people from us. Clearly, every A.A. member's name--and story,
too--had to be confidential, if he wished.

<< << << >> >> >>

We now fully realize that 100 per cent personal anonymity before the
public is just as vital to the life of A.A. as 100 per cent sobriety is to
the life of each and every member. This is not counsel of fear; it is the
prudent voice of long experience.

1. 12 & 12, p. 185
2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 293

***********************************************************

Walk In Dry Places
 
The new problems in sobriety
Fortitude
Sometimes sobriety turns up problems that were never apparent during one's drinking days. Some people, for example, encounter marriage problems that lead to divorce. It almost appears that some things were better when we were drinking.
But there are good reasons why sobriety brings new problems. One is that we become aware of problems that were there all the time, although not acknowledged. It's possible, too, that sobriety brings more responsibility, along with risks of failure. At the same time, we might be more sensitive to the real problems of living.
We should never use such problems as an excuse for drinking. It is true, as many people say, that drinking can only make matters worse. Nothing can be improved by a return to drinking.
I must remember today that sobriety means living on a new basis. This includes facing problems and dealing with them... not running from them as I did in the past.

***********************************************************

Keep It Simple
 
I wish you the courage to be warm when the world would prefer you to be cool.Robert A. Ward
Our program and the Steps have warmed us from the inside out. Just as a bonfire warms those who stand around it, the Steps take away the chill we have felt for so long.
At Times, we’ll be tempted to move away from the Steps. At times, we’ll get tired of looking at our behavior and attitudes. We are by nature, controlling people. We’ll want to
“prove our point” about something when our program tells us to let  it go. We need to stay close to the Steps and the warmth they hold. Remember the chill of our disease.
Prayer for the Day:  I need to member that the Steps and the fellowship of the program keep me sober, not me alone. 
Action for the Day:  Today, I’ll thank about what the Steps have done for me. I will think of how they have kept me warm.

***********************************************************

Each Day a New Beginning

The most elusive knowledge of all is self-knowledge.  --Mirra Komarovsky
Discovering who we are is an adventure, one that will thrill and sometimes trouble us and will frequently occupy our thoughtful reflections. We are growing and changing as a result of our commitment to the program. And it's that process of commitment that heightens our self-awareness.
We learn who we are by listening to others, by sensing their perceptions of us, by taking an honest, careful inventory of our own behavior. The inner conversations that haunt us while we're interacting with others are poignant guidelines to self-knowledge, self-definition. Just when we think we've figured out who we are and how to handle our flaws, a new challenge will enter our realm of experiences, shaking up all the understandings that have given us guidance heretofore.
It is not an easy task to discover who we really are. It's an even harder job to love and accept the woman we discover. But too many years went by while we avoided or denied or, worse yet, denounced the only person we knew how to be. The program offers us the way to learn about and love fully the person within. Nor will we find the way easy every day. But there's time enough to let the process ease our investigation.
I will be soft and deliberate today as I listen to others and myself.

***********************************************************

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

The Doctor's Opinion

The physician who, at our request, gave us this letter, has been kind enough to enlarge upon his views in another statement which follows. In this statement he confirms what we who have suffered alcoholic torture must believe—that the body of the alcoholic is quite as abnormal as his mind. It did not satisfy us to be told that we could not control our drinking just because we were maladjusted to life, that we were in full flight from reality, or were outright mental defectives. These things were true to some extent, in fact, to a considerable extent with some of us. But we are sure that our bodies were sickened as well. In our belief, any picture of the alcoholic which leaves out this physical factor is incomplete.

p. xxvi

***********************************************************

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Student Of Life

Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink.  But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.

I wound up on academic probation (I had always been on the honor roll in high school) my first semester sophomore year, and my response to that was to change my major. My life in campus revolved around parties, drinking, and men. I surrounded myself with people who drank as I did. Even though several people had already expressed their concern over my drinking, I rationalized that I was only doing what every other red-blooded college student did.

p. 321

***********************************************************

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step One - "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol--that our lives had become unmanageable. "

It is a tremendous satisfaction to record that in the following years this changed. Alcoholics who still had their health, their families, their jobs, and even two cars in the garage, began to recognize their alcoholism. As this trend grew, they were joined by young people who were scarcely more than potential alcoholics. They were spared that last ten or fifteen years of literal hell the rest of us had gone through. Since Step One requires an admission that our lives have become unmanageable, how could people such as these take this Step?

p. 23

***********************************************************

As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 -1882)

Although we have been made to believe that if we let go we will end up with nothing,
life itself reveals again and again the opposite; that letting go is the path to real
freedom.
--Sogyai Rinpoche

This above all else: to your own self be true.
--unknown

Outstanding leaders go out of the way to boost the self-esteem of their personnel. If
people believe in themselves, it's amazing what they can accomplish.
--Sam Walton

The deeds you do today may be the only sermon some people will hear today.
--St. Francis of Assisi

Make big decisions in the calm.
--Dwight D. Eisenhower

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

ORATORY

"The finest eloquence is that
which get things done."
-- David Lloyd George

I know how to talk. I know how to sound good. I know how to convince a person of my
good intentions --- indeed that was part of my manipulation for years.

Today I try to walk the talk. I try to demonstrate what I say in the behavior I exhibit.
The bottom line is action. Talking never stopped me from drinking --- my physical refusal
of the first drink was the start of my recovery.

God is to be discovered not merely in pious sentiments, as attractive as they may
sound, but rather in the small steps of altered behavior.

Am I doing what I am saying? Lord give me the courage to live my words.

***********************************************************

God blesses the people who patiently endure testing.
James 1:12

Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart.
Psalm 86:11

"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you,
along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other,
just as God in Christ also has forgiven you."
Ephesians 4:31-32

***********************************************************

Daily Inspiration

It is usually easier to start a project than to finish it. Lord, help me spend less time thinking about what I want to do, so that I can have the time to feel the gratification of completing what I started.

Pray even when your heart has no words rather than to pray words with no heart. Lord, You faithfully answer all prayers. I will trust in Your answers and never take Your love for granted.

***********************************************************

NA Just For Today

Attitudes

"We can also use the steps to improve our attitudes."

Basic Text, p.53

Ever have a day when everything seems to be working against you? Do you go through periods when you are so busy taking people's inventories you can barely stand yourself? What about when you find yourself snapping at your co-worker or loved one for no reason? When we find ourselves in this bleak frame of mind, we need to take action.

At any point in the day, we can set aside a few moments and take a "spot inventory." We examine how we are reacting to outside situations and other people. When we do, we may find that we are suffering from a plain old "bad attitude." A negative outlook can hurt our relationship with our Higher Power and the people in our lives. When we are honest with ourselves, we frequently find that the problem lies with us and our attitude.

We have no control over the challenges life gives us. What we can control is how we react to those challenges. At any point in time, we can change our attitude. The only thing that really changes in Narcotics Anonymous is us. The Twelve Steps give use the tools to move out of the problem and into the solution.

Just for today: Throughout the day, I will check my attitude. I will apply the steps to improve it.

pg. 314

***********************************************************

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I feel no need for any other faith than my faith in human beings. --Pearl S. Buck
We owe each other respect. We cannot expect to be respected if we don't respect others around us. When we respect others, we respect their property and personal belongings as well as their self-esteem and their right to voice an opinion. Respect is a way of cooperating with each other.
We can imagine a submarine where crewmembers did not respect each other's personal belongings or their ability to do the job. The ship would soon stop functioning because of the chaos. In a family we live in close quarters, like a submarine crew. Respect for each other is one of the things, which keeps chaos from breaking out. When we grow in respect for each other's property, abilities, and self-esteem, we soon see how valuable each member of our crew really is.
How can I show respect to those around me today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Often our trust is not full. We are not certain that God hears us because we consider ourselves worthless and as nothing. This is ridiculous and the very cause of our weakness. I have felt this way myself. --Julian of Norwich
Many men do not think they are worthy of recovery. Some of us even fight against our own progress. We can't seem to reconcile our low self-image with all the benefits recovery brings. This is not surprising when we see how many years we lived in self-abusive addictions. We had lifestyles in which we were treated badly by others, we abused ourselves, and we used and abused others. In our insanity, this sometimes felt masculine. Such a life does not prepare us to feel worthy of the good things in recovery. It is ridiculous to continue such pain simply because it's what we have known.
To turn this pattern around, we have to accept our Higher Power's view of us. Our Higher Power accepts us and sees us as deserving the benefits of recovery. We can get out of the way of our recovery by letting go of our unworthy feelings.
Today, I will be open to the benefits of recovery.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The most elusive knowledge of all is self-knowledge. --Mirra Komarovsky
Discovering who we are is an adventure, one that will thrill and sometimes trouble us and will frequently occupy our thoughtful reflections. We are growing and changing as a result of our commitment to the program. And it's that process of commitment that heightens our self-awareness.
We learn who we are by listening to others, by sensing their perceptions of us, by taking an honest, careful inventory of our own behavior. The inner conversations that haunt us while we're interacting with others are poignant guidelines to self-knowledge, self-definition. Just when we think we've figured out who we are and how to handle our flaws, a new challenge will enter our realm of experiences, shaking up all the understandings that have given us guidance heretofore.
It is not an easy task to discover who we really are. It's an even harder job to love and accept the woman we discover. But too many years went by while we avoided or denied or, worse yet, denounced the only person we knew how to be. The program offers us the way to learn about and love fully the person within. Nor will we find the way easy every day. But there's time enough to let the process ease our investigation.
I will be soft and deliberate today as I listen to others and myself.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Meditation and Prayer
The Eleventh Step asks us to meditate as a route to improving our conscious contact with God.
Meditation is different than obsessing or worrying. Obsession and worrying are fear connections. Meditation means opening our mind and our spiritual energy to the God connection.
To connect with God, we need to relax as best we can and open our conscious and subconscious mind to a Higher Consciousness - one that is available to each of us.
In the busyness of our day and life, it may seem like a waste of time to slow down, to stop what we're doing, and take this kind of break. It is no more a waste of time than stopping to put gas in our car when the tank is almost empty. It is necessary, it is beneficial, and it saves time. In fact, meditation can create more time and energy than the moments we take to do it.
Meditation and prayer are powerful recovery behaviors that work. We need to be patient. It is not reasonable to expect immediate answers, insight, or inspiration.
But solutions are coming. They are already on the way, if we have done our part - meditate and pray - and then let the rest go.
Whether we pray and meditate first thing in the morning, during a coffee break, or in the evening is our choice.
When our conscious contact with God improves, our subconscious contact will too. We will find ourselves increasingly tuned in to God's harmony and will for us. We will find and maintain that soul connection, the God connection.
Today, I will take a moment for meditation and prayer. I will decide when and how long to do it. I am a child and creation of God - a Higher Power who loves to listen and talk to me. God, help me let go of my fears about whether or not You hear and care. Help me know that You are there and that I am able to tap into the spiritual consciousness.


It feels so good to like all of me today. I feel warm and comforted in knowing that I am just fine... just the way I am. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Let Yourself Take Side Trips

"You're on a journey," the Native American shaman from Sedona said, "bit it's not what you think. Don't be like the deer, who looks straight ahead and sees only the destination. Let yourself take all the side trips you can. Travel the back roads, take your time. Talk to people and touch the trees. See all you've come here to see."

Sometimes we need to make side trips-- side trips into experiences, emotions, situations that take us off center and somewhere new. Sometimes that's where our greatest learning and growth occur.

If a safe trip is beckoning, perhaps there's a lesson there: an old feeling to be felt, healed, and cleared; a new attitude or belief to be acquired; a revelation, a surprise. Remember this: a side trip, with all it's emotions, isn't about another person. It's about you and your journey to healing, freedom, and joy. Ignoring a situation that can take you off center won't take you to the next place. Going more deeply into your own growth process, going more deeply into your soul is what will further your journey.

Everything that happens to you can be used, felt, shaped and transformed to further your journey. This process of growth, of side trips and healing, is your destiny, the magical journey of your soul.

To get to the next place, we need to leave the comfortable main road we've been traveling. Sometimes a side trip is exactly what we need to make.

*****

more language of letting go
Let enlightenment come

Sometimes, the harder we try to see a lesson, the more lost and confused we become. "What does it mean?" we ask, squinting at the problem.

Relax. Let go of your expectations and you interpretations. Quit trying so hard to see.

Sometimes the lesson may be a simple reminder to see the sacred in your ordinary life or to practice compassion for yourself as well as for others. Sometimes what we're going through is part of a larger lesson, one that may take us years to complete and comprehend. It's easy to fall into the false belief that there's some lesson that we have to push and struggle to learn. There isn't.

We only have to see what we see and know what we know right now.

Experience your life.

More shall be revealed when it's time.

Practice seeing without squinting.

God, help me be present to the situations in my life without trying to read too deeply into them. Help me trust that my lessons will become clear when it's time.

*****

Energy to Spare
Knowing Your Limits

Every human life is defined, to some extent, by limits. No one person is capable of fulfilling every possibility. We are all born with unique aptitudes and sensitivities, and it is these qualities that largely determine the paths we will travel in life. What invigorates, excites, and inspires one individual may exhaust or overwhelm another. When we understand what we as individuals are capable of reasonably handling, we gradually learn to accept that we have control over our wellbeing. Yet determining where our limits lie can be difficult, as it is likely we have been told time and again that the discomfort, fatigue, and stress we felt while engaging in activities outside the range of our comfort zones was all in our heads. If you have never before given thought to the notion of personal limits, creating a list of those tasks and situations that leave you feeling drained can give you insight into your own.

You will know definitively that you are operating within your limits when you have the necessary energy and drive to address your personal and professional commitments. This is not to say you should not push yourself or work to extend the range of your capabilities. The wisdom you gain through dynamic self-examination will give you the tools you need to create an individual life strategy that allows you to achieve your goals without compromising yourself or your needs. The limits you honor by focusing your energy on what you can do rather than what you cannot do will not interfere with your ambitions unless you allow them to interfere. You can thrive within your limits, actively shape your circumstances, and avoid anguish by simply recognizing that certain aspects of life nourish you while others drain you, and doing your best to perceive the fine line between applying yourself diligently and overworking yourself.

You may be surprised to discover that your limits change over time. Your willingness to accept these limits as they reveal themselves to you can smooth your passage through life and give you the means to flourish. Published with permission from Daily OM

*****

A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
"Pride, like a magnet, constantly points to one object, self; unlike the magnet, it has no attractive pole, but at all points repels." - Colton

When the earliest members of The Program discovered just how spiritually prideful they could be, they admonished one another to avoid "instant sainthood." That old-time warning could be taken as an alibi to excuse us from doing our best, but it's really The Program's way of warning against "prideful blindness" and the imaginary perfections we don't possess.

Am I beginning to understand the difference between pride and humility?

Today I Pray
May God, who in His mercy has saved our lives, keep us from setting ourselves up as the saints and prophets of The Program. May we recognize the value of our experiences for others without getting smug about it. May we remember with humility and love the thousands of other "old hands" who are equally well-versed in its principles.

Today I Will Remember
I will avoid "instant sainthood."

************************************

One More Day

Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or lose.
– Lyndon B. Johnson

We can cherish our yesterdays or even regret them, but we can never live them again. The past is behind us; the future lies ahead. We may sometimes be saddened by the thought that the furture might be shorter than our past, but we find comfort in remembering that the future is real and promising; the past is neither.

To find only positives in the past and negatives in the future robs us of one of our greatest gifts — time — and time is what the past can’t give us. Yesterday’s gifts to us are memories, and an occasional backward glance to what once was is natural. But we grow mentally and spiritually by living in this day and planning for tomorrow.

I accept the gifts of yesterday’s memories, today’s reality, and tomorrow’s dreams.

************************************

Food For Thought

Food Is Not Home

Breaking abstinence may be an attempt to go home emotionally. Since we associate food, and especially certain foods, with early experience, we may turn to food when we crave the emotional support of home.

Perhaps our early home life did not provide the emotional support and security we needed, causing us to attach a false significance to the food, which we were given. The habit of turning to food and eating as a substitute for love, acceptance, and security may be deeply ingrained in our psyche. We may have come to depend on food instead of people to satisfy our emotional needs.

The problem is, of course, that food is not a satisfactory substitute for love and acceptance. However much we eat, the emotional satisfaction will be only temporary and soon disintegrate into despair and self-hatred. The home we crave can best be built here and now by working the OA program and loving the people our Higher Power gives us to love today.

May I realize that food is not home.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

Home
“My home is not a place, it is people.”
Lois McMaster Bujold

I’ve spent most of my adult life feeling very alone in the world. My disease of compulsive overeating separated me from others due to my isolation, embarrassment and shame. I was always the outsider looking in at others.

It wasn't until I walked into a twelve step meeting that I found a home for myself. Here these people knew me, heck they WERE me. Whatever I thought, whatever I felt, and whatever I had done in my life, so had others in OA. I am accepted in my totality. OA is the only place where I feel truly safe and at home. I am not alone anymore. The entire twelve step fellowship is on my side ~ and what a great feeling that is!

One day at a time...
I will make OA my home.
~ Cindi L.

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Imagine life without faith! were nothing left but pure reason, it wouldn't be life. But we believed in life - of course we did. We could not prove life in the sense that you can prove a straight line is the shortest distance between two points, yet, there it was. Could we still say the whole thing was nothing but a mass of electrons, created out of nothing, meaning nothing, whirling on to a destiny of nothingness? Of course we couldn't. The electrons themselves seemed more intelligent than that. At least, so the chemist said. - Pg. 54 - We Agnostics

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Slogans seem silly but they are important tools: first things first; one day at a time; kiss. We say them frequently because we need to burn them into our thoughts. Slogans are not 'fillers' for reluctant speakers. They embody important principles necessary to our path of recovery.

With the next slogan I hear, let me really HEAR it, know its importance, and practice it.

Suffering

Today, I will not hide my pain and suffering from myself or from my Higher Power. When I bring my most honest and pure self to the fore and understand my essential powerlessness over situations, when I am truly willing to turn over this angst to a power greater than myself, something changes. I let go and create space for a shift in perception. I experience a quiet awakening in my life, and forces that did not have room to enter are coming in to heal me. It is in letting go that I have a chance of achieving what I desire in my life. Holding on pushes away what I want, while releasing lets it all have enough breathing room so it can stay alive.

I open my heart to my Higher Power.

- Tian Dayton PhD

' Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody... I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.... We must find each other. '
- Mother Teresa

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

'Laughter has something in it in common with the ancient winds of faith and inspiration; it unfreezes pride and unwinds secrecy; it makes people forget themselves in the presence of something greater than themselves; something that they cannot resist.' ~G.K. Chesterton

I cannot feel sorry for myself and laugh at the same time, so I take my levity seriously.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

It's not the 'yets' we have to worry about, it's the 'again's.'

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

It feels so good to like all of me today. I feel warm and comforted in knowing that I am just fine just the way I am.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

God doesn't need much; whatever we have left is enough.- Anon.

*****************************************

AA Thought for the Day

October 28

Living Sober
Somewhat to our surprise, staying sober turns out not to be the grim, wet-blanket experience we had expected!
While we were drinking, a life without alcohol seemed like no life at all.
But for most members of AA, living sober is really living -- a joyous experience.
We much prefer it to the troubles we had while drinking.
- Living Sober, foreword

Thought to Ponder . . .
I have learned that I did not get here a day early or a drink short.

AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
A A = Always Awesome.

~*~A.A. Thoughts For The Day~*~

Loneliness
"Almost without exception,
alcoholics are tortured by loneliness.
Even before our drinking got bad
and people began to cut us off,
nearly all of us suffered the feeling we didn't quite belong.
Either we were shy, and dared not draw near others,
or we were apt to be noisy good fellows
craving attention and companionship,
but never getting it -- at least to our way of thinking.
There was always that mysterious barrier
we could neither surmount nor understand. . .
That's one reason we loved alcohol too well.
It did let us act extemporaneously.
But even Bacchus boomeranged on us;
we were finally struck down and left
in terrified loneliness."
c.1952AAWS, Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 57

Thought to Consider . . .
Isolation is a darkroom where we develop negatives.

*~*~*AACRONYMS*~*~*
H A L T = Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired

*~*~*~*~*^Just For Today!^*~*~*~*~*

Forgiveness
Step Eight: Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
These obstacles, however, are very real. The first, and one of the most difficult has to do with forgiveness. The moment we ponder a twisted or broken relationship with another person, our emotions go on the defensive. To escape looking at the wrongs we have done another, we resentfully focus on the wrong that he has done us. This is especially true if he has, in fact, behaved badly at all. Triumphantly we seize upon his misbehavior as the perfect excuse for minimizing or forgetting our own.
1981, AAWS, Inc., Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, page 78

*~*~*~*~*^ Grapevine Quote ^*~*~*~*~*

"In this life we shall attain nothing like perfect humility and love. So we shall have to settle, respecting most of our problems, for a very gradual progress, punctuated sometimes by heavy setbacks. Our old-time attitudes of 'all or nothing' will have to be abandoned."
AA Co-Founder, Bill W., March 1962
"What Is Acceptance?"
The Language of the Heart

*~*~*~*~*^ Big Book & Twelve N' Twelve Quotes of the Day ^*~*~*~*~*

"Reminding ourselves that we have decided to go to any lengths to
find a spiritual experience, we ask that we be given strength and
direction to do the right thing, no matter what the personal
consequences may be."
~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 79~

This painful past may be of infinite value to other families still
struggling with their problem. We think each family which has been
relieved owes something to those who have not, and when the occasion
requires, each member of it should be only too willing to bring
former mistakes, no matter how grievous, out of their hiding places.
Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very thing
which makes life seem so worth while to us now.
~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 124~ a message...

He finally realizes that he has undergone a profound alteration in his reaction to life; that such a change could hardly have been brought about by himself alone.
-Alcoholics Anonymous p.569

Our Twelfth Step also says that as a result of practicing all the Steps, we have each found something called a spiritual awakening.
-Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions p.106

Misc. AA Literature - Quote

'In our behavior respecting financial and emotional security, fear, greed, possessiveness, and pride have too often done their worst. Surveying his business or employment record, almost any alcoholic can ask questions like these: In addition to my drinking problem, what character defects contributed to my financial instability? Did fear and inferiority about my fitness for my job destroy my confidence and fill me with conflict? Or did I overvalue myself and play the big shot?
Businesswomen in A.A. will find that these questions often apply to them, too, and the alcoholic housewife can also make the family financially insecure. Indeed, all alcoholics need to cross-examine themselves ruthlessly to determine how their own personality defects have demolished their security.

Prayer for the Day: Help Me Remember - Lord, Help me remember that nothing is going to happen to me today that You and I together can't handle.