***********************************************************

As Bill Sees It

Ourselves as Individuals, p.281

There is only one sure test of all spiritual experiences: "By their
fruits, ye shall know them."

This is why I think we should question no one's
transformation--whether it be sudden or gradual. Nor should we
demand anyone's special type for ourselves, because experience
suggests that we are apt to receive whatever may be the most useful
for our own needs.

**********************************

Human beings are never quite alike, so each of us, when making
an inventory, will need to determine what his individual character
defects are. Having found the shoes that fit, he ought to step into
them and walk with new confidence that he is at last on the right
track.

1. Grapevine, July 1963
2. Twelve and Twelve, p.48

***********************************************************

Walk In Dry Places
 
Putting our trust in people.
Trust
How much should we trust other people?  This is an important question, because many of us have erred in both directions:  we've trusted people too much or not enough.
We can find our answer in the spiritual side of the program. We do have a Higher Power in whom we can have absolute trust. We can have little doubt that the spiritual presence behind everything is infallible and supreme.
As human beings, we know that we can only be trusted in certain ways. We can work to develop our trustworthiness, but it is never high enough, even with the strongest souls.  All of us have weaknesses that can keep us from being what we know to be our best.
In our 12 Step living, we should work to develop trust in both ourselves and others, but no be hurt or disappointed when things go wrong. Above all, our real trust should be in our Higher Power.
I'll work today to be trusting and trustworthy, but I'll not expect too much of anybody, including myself.

***********************************************************

Keep It Simple
 
The foolish and the dead never change their opinions.---James Russell Lowell
We need to stay fresh in our program. We need to be open to new ideas. We need change. The ways we work the Steps should change for us as the years go by. And as we grow, more of the fog of our denial clears away. Then we see the world and our program in different ways.
We need to allow this to happen. At times, it’s scary to give up old ways and old opinions, but this is what allows new growth. Every day, we wake up to a new  world. Being alive means change. Opinions and ideas are like a strong tree: the base is strong, but leaves change with the seasons.
Prayer for the Day:  Higher Power, help me stay fresh and alive. Help me stay open to new ideas and attitudes.
Help me to not become rigid.
Action for the Day:  Today, I’ll ask two friends to tell me how I may be rigid. I will listen to what they say.

***********************************************************

Each Day a New Beginning

Sometimes it's worse to win a fight than to lose.  --Billie Holiday
Our struggles with other people always take their toll on us. They often push us to behavior we're not proud of. They may result in irreparable rifts. They frequently trigger an emotional relapse. No battle is worth the damage to the psyche that nearly any battle can cause. Nonresistance is the safer way to chart our daily course.
Bowing with the wind, flowing with the tide, eases the steps we need to take, the steps that will carry us to our personal fulfillment. Part of the process of our growth is learning to slide past the negative situations that confront us, coming to understand that we are in this life to fulfill a unique purpose. The many barriers that get in our way can strengthen our reliance on God if we'll let them. People or situations need never thwart us. We will profit from taking all experiences in our stride. The course we travel is the one we chart. The progress we make toward our life goals is proportionate to the smoothness of our steps.
I will flow with the tide. It will assuredly move me closer to my destination.

***********************************************************

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Foreword To Second Edition

Figures given in this foreword describe the Fellowship as it was in 1955.

In the spring of 1940, John D. Rockefeller, Jr. gave a dinner for many of his friends to which he invited A.A. members to tell their stories. News of this got on the world wires; inquiries poured in again and many people went to the bookstores to get the book "Alcoholics Anonymous." By March 1941 the membership had shot up to 2,000. Then Jack Alexander wrote a feature article in the Saturday Evening Post and placed such a compelling picture of A.A. before the general public that alcoholics in need of help really deluged us. By the close of 1941, A.A. numbered 8,000 members. The mushrooming process was in full swing. A.A. had become a national institution.

p. xviii

***********************************************************

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories

My Chance To Live

A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.

When I couldn't find an easier, softer way, I looked for the person with the magic wand, the one person in A.A. who could make me all better, right now.  This was a frustrating task, and I finally realized that if I wanted this life, I was going to have to do what the others had done.  No one made me drink, and no one was going to make me stay sober.  This program is for people who want it, not for people who need it.

p. 315

***********************************************************

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Foreword

A.A.'s Twelve Traditions apply to the life of the Fellowship itself. They outline the means by which A.A. maintains its unity and relates itself to the world about it, the way it lives and grows.

p. 15

***********************************************************

Do not be wise in words - be wise in deeds.
--Jewish Proverb

Thought is the blossom; language the bud; action the fruit behind it.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Your family and your love must be cultivated like a garden. Time, effort, and
imagination must be summoned constantly to keep any relationship flourishing and
growing."
--Jim Rohn

"If you raise your children to feel that they can accomplish any goal or task they decide
upon, you will have succeeded as a parent and you will have given your children one of
the greatest of all blessings."
--Brian Tracy

"Wanting what I don't have keeps me from having what I do have."

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

TOLERANCE

"Art, if it is to be reckoned with
as one of the great values of life,
must teach men . . . tolerance."
-- Somerset Maugham

There is something about art that is accepting, tolerant and reconcilable with
"difference". I have observed that artists --- those who paint, write, dance, sculpture,
design --- are also people who are accepting and tolerant because they need the
"different" in order to create and progress. Things cannot stay the same and art is the
recorder of man's journey towards the truth; but mankind needs friction, argument,
confrontation, rejection --- yes, "difference" in order to grow and develop.

People say that artists are crazy, and I suppose this is true. But we need crazy people to
take the world where it needs to go. In the crazy, the seed of genius is often buried.

Lord, before I reject the artist or the "crazy", let me seriously consider the message.

***********************************************************

Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. His love endures forever.
Psalm 136 : 1

"Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is
freedom."
2 Corinthians 3:17

" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
Phillipians 4:13

***********************************************************

Daily Inspiration

Most often a gentle approach is the best resolution to a conflict. Lord, I have been given today to improve myself and make life better for others. Help me walk in the way that You lead me.

Live your life as though today was your last and learn as though you'll live forever. Lord, You ask so little of the talents You have given to me. May I not neglect them.

***********************************************************

NA Just For Today

Consequences

"Before we got clean, most of our actions were guided by impulse. Today, we are not locked into this type of thinking."

Basic Text p. 87

Ever been tempted to do something even when you knew the results would be disastrous? Ever thought about how much it was going to hurt to do what you were tempted to do, then proceed to do it anyway?

It is said that there are consequences to every action. Before we got clean, many of us simply didn't believe this. But now we know exactly what it means. When we act, we know there will be consequences to pay. No longer can we decide to do something in ignorance when we know full well that we won't like the price we'll have to pay.

There's a prize and a price. It's okay to act despite the consequences if we're willing to pay the price, but there's always one to pay.

Just for today: I will think about the consequences of my actions before I take them.

pg. 296

***********************************************************

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Look, the wind vane fluttering in the autumn breeze
Takes hold of certain things that cannot be held. --Feng Chih
When we think we are losing our grip, we have good reason to look up. Consider the moon suspended in the sky, how it continues to come and go, follows its natural law, and never really loses face. Consider the sun, the stars, the seasons, how they refuse to abandon us, to let go of their hold on our lives. And come closer to home. We can marvel at the magic of small efficient things--the toaster and stove, the light in the room, the words in a good book that are permanent, faithful, and clear. We can consider how music, without saying a word, still speaks to us, and how a few friends, maybe miles away, continue to hang on to the strength of our small and faithful words.
We can keep in mind that we are part of a complex and loving system, and our grip can never be lost.
How do I see my unity with my surroundings today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitudes. --Victor Frankl
When we stand and look at a mountain, it looks awesome, majestic, and perhaps intimidating. To climb the mountain we will need to select a route. Which approach will give us success? Which will provide a beautiful view? Which is safest? What are the rewards and trade offs among the paths available?
In our lives, we usually cannot choose the mountains that face us, but we can choose the best paths to approach them. One path may be a very negative attitude. It may feel safe like a narrow, protected passageway. It is predictable, but it keeps us cut off from others. Another path may be filled with too many self-indulgent pleasures and never progress in any direction. Another path may be hard and include some risks, but it allows us to be in contact with others and to appreciate the beauty along the way. When we make positive choices about our attitudes, although the mountain is challenging, we are liberated to become the kind of men we're meant to be.
Today, I will choose friendly attitudes toward myself that will help me on my journey.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Sometimes it's worse to win a fight than to lose. --Billie Holiday
Our struggles with other people always take their toll on us. They often push us to behavior we're not proud of. They may result in irreparable rifts. They frequently trigger an emotional relapse. No battle is worth the damage to the psyche that nearly any battle can cause. Nonresistance is the safer way to chart our daily course.
Bowing with the wind, flowing with the tide, eases the steps we need to take, the steps that will carry us to our personal fulfillment. Part of the process of our growth is learning to slide past the negative situations that confront us, coming to understand that we are in this life to fulfill a unique purpose. The many barriers that get in our way can strengthen our reliance on God if we'll let them. People or situations need never thwart us. We will profit from taking all experiences in our stride. The course we travel is the one we chart. The progress we make toward our life goals is proportionate to the smoothness of our steps.
I will flow with the tide. It will assuredly move me closer to my destination.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Payoffs from Destructive Relationships
Sometimes it helps to understand that we may be receiving a payoff from relationships that cause us distress.
The relationship may be feeding into our helplessness or our martyr role.
Maybe the relationships feeds our need to be needed, enhancing our self-esteem by allowing us to feel in control or morally superior to the other person.
Some of us feel alleviated from financial or other kinds of responsibility by staying in a particular relationship.
"My father sexually abused me when I was a child," said one woman. "I went on to spend the next twenty years blackmailing him emotionally and financially on this. I could get money from him whenever I wanted, and I never had to take financial responsibility for myself."
Realizing that we may have gotten a codependent payoff from a relationship is not a cause for shame. It means we are searching out the blocks in ourselves that may be stopping our growth.
We can take responsibility for the part we may have played in keeping ourselves victimized. When we are willing to look honestly and fearlessly at the payoff and let it go, we will find the healing we've been seeking. We'll also be ready to receive the positive, healthy payoffs available in relationships, the payoffs we really want and need.
Today, I will be open to looking at the payoffs I may have received from staying in unhealthy relationships, or from keeping destructive systems operating. I will become ready to let go of my need to stay in unhealthy systems; I am ready to face myself.


Today I will do something very special just for me. I will treat myself to something I want to have or do and feel good about myself while I do it. My life is very important to me and I have the right to be happy. --Ruth Fishel

************************************

Journey To The Heart
October 10
We Are Transmitters and Receivers

We are a finely tuned instrument– body, mind, and soul. We receive messages, we receive guidance. And we transmit energy– the energy of love.

When we become off center, we become like two-way radios whose tuners aren’t on the right frequency. We aren’t receiving or transmitting clearly. We hear and feel the static. Often, instinctively, that’s when we start broadcasting more loudly, sometimes screaming to be heard. Now is not the time to crank up the volume.

Take the time you need to get centered, to get peaceful. What do you need to do? What do you need to feel? What healing resources do you need to utilize? What’s your voice, your quiet, trustworthy inner voice, the one that speaks through your heart, urging you to do?

Taking time to get centered and peaceful isn’t selfish. It’s not a waste of time. When we’re receiving clearly, we transmit clearly.

And the frequency we use is love.

*****

more language of letting go
See how it feels to do it right

In skydiving, there's an activity called dirt diving. At the drop zone, you'll see people lying on their bellies on contraptions that look like skateboards. They make all the moves on the ground as if they were free-falling through the air. They're training their bodies and themselves to do it right. They're experiencing how it feels to do it right.

Do you have something you're trying to learn how to do? Are you struggling to let go of someone? Are you trying to do something for the first time-- conquer your fear of flying or write a book? Do you have a meeting scheduled that's causing you some strain? Maybe you need to approach your boss and ask for a raise.

See yourself doing it. Quiet yourself first by deliberately relaxing each part of your body and mind. Then imagine yourself doing it, whatever it is. See how it feels to do it right. Go into each detail of how you would feel if you were doing it right.

If you encounter a block that keeps you from moving forward smoothly in your visualization time, ask your Higher Power or yourself how to remedy or release that block. Do you have a fear that's blocking you? Is it new or an old fear? Maybe it's concern over what somebody told you long ago about your inadequacy. Release that energy, then start all over again, seeing what it feels like to do it right. Keep at your visualization until you can go through the entire process smoothly, from beginning to end.

If you try but can't imagine yourself doing something, much less see how it feels to do it right, maybe you're trying to do something that's not right for you. Ask your Higher Power for guidance about that,too.

Visualization can give us time to safely dirt-dive and work through awkwardness, fears, and potential blocks and problems. Sometimes spending quiet time trying to visualize how it feels to do it right can give us a message that either this is or isn't the right time or thing for us.

God, help me use my mental powers to create the most positive scenes I can imagine taking place in my life.

*****

Best Friends
A Warm Refuge by Madisyn Taylor

Our best friends are a warm refuge in which we feel free to be fully ourselves.

By the time we reach adulthood, many of us have had the good fortune to have at least one best friend. If we have moved around or changed our life situation repeatedly, we may be lucky enough to have had several. The best friend relationship is often our earliest intimate peer relationship, and it can be a source of great warmth and connection throughout our lives. The details of best friendship change as we grow up and grow older, but the heart of it remains the same. Our best friends are a warm refuge in which we feel free to be fully ourselves, to share our deepest secrets, to rest when we are tired, to celebrate when we are happy—a place in which we feel utterly welcome to give and receive that most precious of all gifts, love.

Most intimate relationships hit bumps from time to time, and one of the hallmarks of an enduring best friendship is its ability to ride out the turbulence and remain intact even as it faces changes. Our best friends are those who manage to love us through all of our transitions, as we do the same for them. We find ways to embrace and appreciate the differences that set us apart and offer love and support no matter what. We allow each other to be exactly as we are at a given moment, even as we allow each other to change over time. In this way, best friends sometimes feel like family. We know we will stick together regardless of where our individual paths lead.

We may be on the phone with our best friends every day, or we may not have spoken for a year, yet we know that our bond will be strong and immediate when we do connect. This bond ties us together even when we are apart and draws us blissfully back into the warm refuge of each other’s company when our paths bring us together again.

************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

When we allow our Higher Power to take charge, without reservations on our part, we stop being “anxious.” When we’re not anxious about some person or situation, that doesn’t mean we’re disinterested or have stopped caring. Just the opposite is true. We can be interested and caring without being anxious or fearful. The poised, calm and faith-filled person brings something positive to every situation. He or she is able to do the things that are necessary and helpful. Do I realize how much better prepared I am to do wise and loving things if I banish anxious thoughts and know that God is in charge?

Today I Pray

I pray that I may be rid of the anxiety which I have equated in my mind with really caring about people. May I know that anxiety is not an item of outerwear that can be doffed like a cap. May I know that I must have serenity within myself and confidence that God can do a better job that I can — and then my anxiety will lessen.

Today I Will Remember

Anxiety never solved anything.

************************************

One More Day

But if a man happens to find himself … he has a mansion which he can inhabit with dignity all the days of his life.
– James Michener

If only, we think, I could regain that joy, that feeling of being so pleased with myself that I had as a child. if we think about it, we might decide that the child didn’t disappear; it may still be waiting to be freed once again.

We can pause and look at what we have become as adults. If we see self-worth by pleasing or impressing others, we may have stopped listening to that childlike voice that tells us to trust ourselves. Dignity, self-worth, contentment — these things grow out of a sense of self, not from the opinions of others.

The choices I make today will be based on my own values.

************************************

Food For Thought

Powerless

I am powerless over food. By myself, I am unable to control what I eat or manage my life. Thanks to OA, I have found a Higher Power by which I am learning to live a new life.

So that this Higher Power may live in me, I surrender myself. No longer do I try to live by my own efforts; no longer do I try by myself to control what I eat. Since I am powerless over food and cannot manage my life, I give myself to God as I understand Him and ask that He live through me.

When I surrender, my Higher Power takes over. Then, instead of being weak and powerless, I become strong through His strength. So very simple. I wonder why it takes so long to learn? The only requirement is, in the words of T.S. Eliot, "a condition of complete simplicity, costing not less than everything."

May I remember that without You I am powerless.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

TOLERANCE
“I have learned silence from the talkative,
toleration from the intolerant, and kindness
from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful
to those teachers.”
Khalil Gibran

Two of my biggest character defects are arrogance and fear. I used to have a hard time tolerating people who are not like me. When I was driven by fear, anger, and shame, I believed they threatened my social position. A normal day for me was filled with frustration and anger at people I didn’t like. Gossip was my language.

After I decided that I was truly powerless over my addiction and that my life had become really unmanageable, I surrendered. I started writing the suggested Step work and had a great awakening. In the 4th Step inventory, I came to the conclusion that I did not like “different people” because I was afraid to be like them. And what were they like? Just like me. I didn't like myself. That was one of the most revealing acknowledgements that were given to me. I have no reason to pick a fight anymore, nor discuss or judge any person. When I meet people I do not like, I know why.

One day at a time...
My greatest teachers are those who have shown me what I do not like or accept about myself. I understand that I would never have appreciated these lessons as precious gifts without the understanding, growth and tolerance within the 12 Step fellowship. Today I make a living amend by never judging or disliking any person. Every human being is a creature of God as I understand him, and who am I to judge?
~ Trine

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Live and let live is the rule. If you both show a willingness to remedy your own defects, there will be little need to criticize each other. - Pg. 118 - To Wives

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

We must always fan the flame of inspiration and enthusiasm or our slight hold on sobriety will flicker and fade. We fan the flame by going to meetings, listening to the professionals we hire, choose and use a sponsor, and we must help others.

God, as I understand You, please show me one person I can give an encouraging word to in this hour.

My Interaction with My World

I elicit a particular response from the world about how it sees me based on what I'm putting out there. I get a response, then I take in that information, process it well or badly, consciously or unconsciously, and it becomes a part of me. A part of my wiring psychologically, emotionally and spiritually. Who I am is a product of who I am. Those of us who had great starts in life are lucky, but all of us can do a lot about who we are, and forgiveness is one of those tools that has the power to transform our lives. There's much more to it than meets the eye, more work and more benefit.

- Tian Dayton PhD

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Recovery is the easier, softer way.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I will do something very special just for me. I will treat myself to something I want to have or do and feel good about myself while I do it. My life is very important to me and I have the right to be happy.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Us looking for God is like a fish looking for water. David C.

*****************************************

AA Thought for the Day

October 10

Communication
From the beginning, communication in AA has been no ordinary transmission of helpful ideas and attitudes.
It has been unusual and sometimes unique. Because of our kinship in suffering,
and because our common means of deliverance are effective only when constantly carried to others,
our channels of contact have always been charged with the language of the heart.
- The Language Of The Heart, p. 243

Thought to Ponder . . .
Modem-to-modem or face-to-face, AA's speak the language of the heart.

AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
A A = Always Alive.

~*~A.A. Thoughts For The Day~*~

Sponsorship
"No satisfaction has been deeper and no joy greater
than in a Twelfth Step job well done.
To watch the eyes of men and women open with wonder
as they move from darkness into light,
to see their lives quickly fill with new purpose and meaning,
to see whole families reassembled,
to see the alcoholic outcast received back into his community
in full citizenship,
and above all to watch these people awaken to the
presence of a loving God in their lives --
these things are the substance of what we receive
as we carry AA's message to the next alcoholic."
c.1952AAWS, Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 110

Thought to Consider . . .
A recovering alcoholic without a sponsor
is much like a ship without a rudder.

*~*~*AACRONYMS*~*~*
S P O N S O R = Sober Person Offering Newcomer Support Of Recovery.

*~*~*~*~*^Just For Today!^*~*~*~*~*

Under All Conditions
From: "The Acid Test"
As we work the first nine Steps, we prepare ourselves for the adventure of a new life. But when we approach Step Ten we commence to put our AA way of living to practical use, day by day, in fair weather or foul. Then comes the acid test: can we stay sober, keep in emotional balance, and live to good purpose under all conditions?
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, page 88

I know the Promises are being fulfilled in my life, but I want to maintain and develop them by the daily application of Step Ten. I have learned through this Step that if I am disturbed, there is something wrong with me. The other person may be wrong too, but I can only deal with my feelings. When I am hurt or upset, I have to continually look for the cause in me, and then I have to admit and correct my mistakes. It isn't easy, but as long as I know I am progressing spiritually, I know that I can mark my effort up as a job well done. I have found that pain is a friend; it lets me know there is something wrong with my emotions, just as a physical pain lets me know there is something wrong with my body. When I take the appropriate action through the Twelve Steps, the pain gradually goes away.
1990, AAWS, Inc., Daily Reflections, page 284

*~*~*~*~*^ Grapevine Quote ^*~*~*~*~*

"With the clock ticking like it is, I do not have time for anger, resentment, or self-pity. Time is far too precious."
Durham, N.C., April 2002
"Just an Attitude,"
No Matter What: Dealing with Adversity in Sobriety

*~*~*~*~*^ Big Book & Twelve N' Twelve Quotes of the Day ^*~*~*~*~*

"Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going
to believe they are in that class. By every form of self-deception
and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to
the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. If anyone who is showing inability
to control his drinking can do the right-about-face and drink like a
gentleman, our hats are off to him. Heaven knows, we have tried hard
enough and long enough to drink like other people!"
~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, More About Alcoholism, pg. 31~

In thinking about our day we may face indecision .We may not be able to determine which course to take . Here we ask God for inspiration , an intuitive thought or a decision . We relax and take it easy . We don't struggle . We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while . What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind . Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God , it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times . We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideals . Nevertheless , we find that our thinking will , as time passes , be more and more on the plane of inspiration . We come to rely upon it .
Alcoholics Anonymous Page 86-87

Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.
-Alcoholics Anonymous p.86

We "constructively criticized" someone who needed it, when our real motive was to win a useless argument.
-Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions p. 94

Misc. AA Literature - Quote

I had gone steadily downhill, and on that day in 1934 I lay upstairs in the hospital, knowing for the first time that I was utterly hopeless.
Lois was downstairs, and Dr. Silkworth was trying in his gentle way to tell her what was wrong with me and that I was hopeless. 'But Bill has a tremendous amount of will power,' she said. 'He has tried desperately to get well. We have tried everything. Doctor, why can't he stop?'
He explained that my drinking, once a habit, had become an obsession, a true insanity that condemned me to drink against my will.
'In the late stages of our drinking, the will to resist has fled. Yet when we admit complete defeat and when we become entirely ready to try A.A. principles, our obsession leaves us and we enter a new dimension - freedom under God as we understand Him.

Prayer for the Day: Who, Me? - I need to be forgiven, Lord, so many times a day. So Often do I stumble and fall. Be merciful, I pray. Help me not to be critical when others' faults I see. For so often, Lord, the same faults are in me.